What is Running Towards?

I hate hills. Hill running is tough because it leaves you short of breath. Your legs burn. Your arms get heavy. You feel like someone is standing on your chest. Your feet become like lead and you struggle to lift them off the ground. Your heart aches, begging for relief. You doubt yourself. You doubt your ability. It is too much to bear. You beg for the pain and discomfort to stop.

At a young age, running became for me a way to run away from my problems. We all run away. Sometimes we need to do. Hopefully, we run away in a healthy way that allows us to get perspective on the problem.

There’s a 7.5-mile route I run from my house into town. It has seven hills. I’ve counted every one of them. From a distance, you can see that the hill is manageable. It is when you start to climb the hill that it feels too difficult to climb. I am only able to climb the hills because I saw them from a distance.

Running away becomes unhealthy when we use the means to escape to avoid the hill altogether. I could easily run routes that are flat and avoid the challenges that come with the hills. I find that at first, it seems easier, but running flat routes is harder. You’re working the whole run. No downhill recovery from the climb. It’s just pounding the pavement and making your body do all the work the entire run. Not to mention that it’s incredibly dull.

Sometimes when climbing up that hill we need to focus on something other than the hill. That change in focus is sometimes all you need to do to get up that hill and to think about something other than that discomfort. You can't lose focus for too long because you will lose to that hill and you will fall. I have a few scrapes and bruises to attest to what happens when you don’t regain that focus.

In the end, we run away out of fear. I was afraid at the start of every race. Every one. Afraid of the starting gun, losing, getting hurt, not being able to sustain my pace, not finishing the race, and most of all, disappointing others. You have to put that fear behind you as soon as the gun goes off. The difference between the winner of each race and the rest of the pack was the ability to put fear behind you when the gun goes off. Fear provides short-term motivation at the start but it is not sustainable to win the race.

At some point, we need to stop running away. Focus on what is in front of you. Focus on the hill. Move forward. Climb the hill. Pass the runner in front of you. Attack the next hill. Pass the next runner. One at a time. Now you’re running towards.

Some days you will conquer that hill and win that race. Other days you will stop in the middle of the hill and sit down. Get back up. Keep climbing. Keep racing. Even if the goal is just putting the next foot forward. You’re running towards.

And that is the transformative power of the run.